Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Weigh In Wednesday

Today brings us a nice nugget of weight loss...down 4 pounds. Now I just need to remain focused and remember that I have many more goals I want to achieve. Now that the Amazing Race is back on TV it makes it a reality again that this is something I truly want. I need to get to a weight where I can really train...learn how to run again you know stuff like that!

So to keep my momentum going I am bringing you another installation of "What Does It Look Like!"...132 pounds lost so far..let's see what that looks like shall we??

I've lost this organ...I wonder if they count the monkey that should come with it?
I've lost this car..or should I call it a personal transportation device?
I've lost this dude's turban...this is why I love the Internet..when would you ever see something like this in real life??

I know it's a short little look at what I've lost but it is becoming quite hard to find pictures! I keep getting pics of women and men who have lost what I have. I am also getting a lot ...and I mean a lot of pics of breast augmentations (not really what I need to come up on my Internet history here at work). My question is...are you getting 132 pound breasts?? Or do these women weight 130 pounds and their breasts weight 2? So many questions so little time! Happy Wednesday Everyone!

Monday, February 21, 2011

Pretzels Vs. Me...Who Will Win?

Pretzels...Pretzels....Pretzels....I am hoping that if I keep saying the word then the food will stop dancing around my head. I was never a pretzelaholic by any means but lately it's all I can think about.

I mean look at it! Those beautiful nuggets of salty goodness, the golden brown color, the yeasty flavor..my god I am salivating just looking at this picture! What's worse there is a big bag of these salty knots waiting for me at home. I am trying my best to resist but I may just have to donate it to some pretzel-less family and buy my sister some replacement snack item.

What I really need to do is figure out why...why now? What's going on in my life that cravings are coming in like gang busters! Perhaps it is my underlying belief that if something isn't a totally bitch to complete then I shouldn't do it. What I read here is that self sabotage is kind of my deal. When things are going well I have to find a way to fuck it up (because otherwise who am I?) I am guessing that has something to do with the pessimist side of me that has to keep things in check. You want an excuse not to do something..I am your girl! Fear of failure perhaps? Maybe its a big chili con emotional issues that I've got going on. Not one thing defines why my cravings are coming up. I just wish that I could turn it off. I wish that I could just walk away from that little voice in my head that says "It's ok...just eat the pretzels...you'll get back on plan tomorrow.."

Damn you Gollum...damn you...

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Weigh In Wednesday

Wednesday has shown up again (as it is want to do) and I am not too thrilled. I have gained back 3 pounds. Is it strange that it seems reasonable for me to lose 5 pounds in a week but utterly ludicrous for me to gain 3? I love that my mind works that way! I know why it happened. I have been doing little things all week that have lead up to this. Coffee with milk, maybe not the best choices at a party, home fries on Sunday and a delicious Peanut Butter Cup heart yesterday. I see these choices and I have to take a step back and say "Why?". Why have I let myself back down from my own strict standards? I have a few ideas...

1. The way I look now is the way I always saw myself in my head. It's very strange to realize that and even harder to push past.

2. The compliments are coming in huge waves. Being told on an almost daily basis how amazing your looking..it's hard to not let that go to you head and make you lose focus. I mean they're right of course and I appreciate all the positive feedback, but it does make it easier to justify the little cheats.

3. I am NOT a multitasker. I am trying to tackle other issues in my life and somethings got to give. I don't want it to be my focus on my weight loss but the other things are just as important to me.

I ask you though..what is the difference between reasons and excuses? Not a whole hell of a lot as far as I can tell. I know what I need to do, and yes, it is incredibly hard. Just as hard as when I started I would say. Except that this time I know what I have to do. It's not uncharted territory. Now how do I get up the steam to keep going? Maybe I need to set a new goal..something small and achievable to keep myself focused? I am open to any and all ideas!

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Weigh In Wednesday!!

Happy Wednesday everyone! Not only is tonight Trivia night (my boyfriend and I are trying to make this a weekly event so we can one day win first place...everyone needs goals!) but I have also lost another 5 pounds! Boo-yah!!! Two big losses in the past two weeks! This makes my total 131 pounds so far. It's pretty fantastic if I do say so myself.

Not to mention it's been a pretty great week so far. I exercised on Monday (Biggest Loser aerobic DVD..and I clearly didn't die from doing it!) and it felt pretty good. This week is jammed with activities but I am hoping to get it in another 2 more times at least! I also got an insane amount of feedback on Facebook and here about my new pics. It is really incredible to me that so many people are inspired by me as I clearly don't see myself that way. However, it would be foolish of me to ignore what I have accomplished so far. I recognize that many people haven't reached the stage where they can do what I've done. Clearly, when I put my mind to something I can accomplish it. It's one of the bigger lessons I have learned about myself.I am far more determined then I ever thought.

I hope everyone's Wednesday is great! Onward and downward :)

Monday, February 7, 2011

Visual Pleasure

Thank you all for your patience with me on getting you some new photos! I hope you all will enjoy them!

A little front action for you!
Can you see how crazy long my pants are now??
As a bonus I wanted to show you more of my new slimmer figure so I took some pics in a new (and by new I mean pieces from my amazing friend Emily's old wardrobe) outfit! It will be the future outfit for all other photo shoots!


Jeans size 22 , Sweater and Top XL

A little side sass for ya
And since I think it's pretty spectacular...a side by side view from week one until now!
I hope you all enjoy these images as much as I do! Back on Wednesday with another Weigh In!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Weigh In Wednesday!

Hi there folkarinos! Oh happy day I am finally seeing the scale moving in the downward direction! I am down 6 pounds today! It feels like a present since the beginning of this week was not stellar (lost out on a job promotion..le sigh). A big loss is just what I needed!

I have been realizing more and more what this journey is all about. It is not about the weight loss but rather it's about finding out who I am, what I want and the person I want to be. I am finally growing up. That stubborn little girl inside of me is no longer running the show. Oh don't you worry she rears her head at times but overall the adult Lynne is finally in charge. I am facing things that I have been hiding from for years. Starting with the fact that I really was an addict. I have done things to feed this addiction that do not speak of the person I truly am or want to be. Knowing this does not make me sad though. It makes me thankful. Thankful that I finally woke up, shook off the blinders and did the momentary painful thing. Thankful that my friends and family never gave up on me. Thankful that they are here now, supporting me. While I may have disappointed them all at one point or another I hope that they can see the change in me. I know I can.

Happy Wednesday Everyone! More weight loss on it's way and who knows..maybe even some exercise (she says begrudgingly)