Weigh In Wednesday

Humpiest of Hump Days to you my friends! Today comes with rain, mild headache and a 4 pound weight loss! I find it hard to believe though since I hadn't lost any weight as of Monday (yes sometimes I will weigh more than once a week to see if I am on track). However, I do know that I didn't lose 4 pounds in 2 days but rather my body may have just adjusted its water levels or something like that ( I say this like I am doctor or something).

In an effort to keep myself focused and on track I have been going through old pictures of myself. It is so easy for me to dismiss how far I have come. It's even easier for me to dismiss people's comments about how different I look. I don't feel any different. I don't think any differently then I did before (for the most part). I don't see how much easier it is for me to move or how much more energy I have. I think because these changes are gradual and thus unnoticed until you reflect back.

I found this picture the other day on Facebook. It is from a student staff party we had in May of last year. It honestly took my breath away. I don't recognize this person. To be honest I know when I first saw the picture last year I don't see what I do now. I knew I wasn't happy with it ( hence why I am not tagged in it). I don't think I looked at pictures of myself then for more than 2 seconds.  A quick glance to see how many chins you could see. I see the person in the mirror now and I can see her in this picture. Hiding. Buried. And I know that I will never be that  person ever again. I don't know how much smaller I will become but I will never hide like that again. I may not always think wonderful things about myself. I may not think that I deserve any of the praise I receive or the happiness that has found it's way into my life. However, I do know that I deserve to never treat myself like that ever again. I was abusing my body for things that it didn't do. Therefore, I would like to issue a formal apology to my body for the years of torment I put it through. I did it blindly because it didn't resist. It didn't give out. It  put up with my abuse because ultimately I am made of strong things. I don't give in easily to anything. Which when used for good is an excellent resource to own. That is why this blog is a wonderful thing to have. I can look back and remind myself of these things when I am being petulant and stubborn about the things I need to do to keep a promise to myself. The promise to treat my body better after years of mistreatment. I hope you all have a lovely rest of your week and maybe take some time out to treat your bodies to some praise & attention!